I'm so pleased, I pulled out the red yarn (scarf above) and am trying again. I have restarted 3 times, but I feel like I finally understand what I was doing wrong all along. Amazing. It's going to be a basketweave
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
OOOOXXXXOOOOXXXX
OOOOXXXXOOOOXXXX
OOOOXXXXOOOOXXXX
OOOOXXXXOOOOXXXX
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
XXXXOOOOXXXXOOOO
Ironically, I just mistyped the above so had to fix that too.
Wish me luck.